Know your stars kh2 version!
by Yoku-Kun
Summary: My second Know your stars thingy!
1. Victum 1: Fuu!

Hi peoples!! I can't believe so many people actually read my other story!! Well I thank all of you read my other one! This Story is gonna be much longer, have more randomness and…there is gonna be a mystery!! Oooooooooo! Well…I hope you guys enjoy!

Disclaimer: Me no own…but me wish…boo…

_**Know your stars!**_

**Annocertress: **HELLO EVERYONE! This is gonna be one of the best know your stars ever! Now, before I bring in the first victim, I will like to present my new, permanent, co-host. Mr. Ansem the Wise!

Ansem the Wise walks through the portal.

**Ansem the Wise: **Hello. I am very happy to be here!

**Annocertress: **Hey…Mr. Ansem the Wise?

**Ansem the Wise: **Yes?

**Annocertress: **Can I call you ATW because your name is a real mouth-full.

**Ansem the Wise: **Sure. I don't mind.

**Annocertress: **Great! Now, let us bring in our victim!

Fuu comes through the portal.

**Fuu: **Stupid moogles… (Cracks her knuckles)

**Annocertress: **Where moogles…?

**Fuu: **Gone…

**Annocertress: **Evil…

**Fuu: **Thank-you…

**ATW: **(Whispers) Why are you talking like that?

**Annocertress: **(Whispers) Because she's one of those short talkers and I want to see if I can talk like that too.

**ATW: **(Whispers) Oh…

**Annocertress: **Fuu…raped Seifer…

**Fuu: **I didn't…

**Annocertress: **You did…

**Fuu: **I didn't…!

**Annocertress: **Fuu…rapist…

**Fuu: **Am not…

**Annocertress: **Are too…

**Fuu: **Liar…

**Annocertress: **Am not…You are…

**Fuu: **Lying liar…

**Annocertress: **… Moogles, Seifer…

Then Seifer comes in…very mad.

**Seifer: **Man those things are so annoying!!

**Annocertress: **Where moogles…

**Seifer: **Oh, I don't think we'll be seeing them for some time. Heh-heh!

* * *

Somewhere is the World That Never Was…

**Marluxia: **Awww!! Someone sent us a kawaii moogle!! (squeezes the moogle)

**Axel: **What kind of whacko sends a moogle in a box?

**Marluxia: **Who cares! Look how cute it is!!

**Demyx: **If I were you I'd send it right back!

**Marluxia: **Why?

**Demyx: **Moogles are EVIL…

**Axel: **He has a point there.

**Marluxia: **Whatever. We're gonna go play now! (Takes the moogle somewhere)

**Axel: **…Bet you 1,000 munny Marluxia gets shot.

**Demyx: **You're on!

**Marluxia: **Come on moogle! Let's go play with my pink rose petals!

**Moogle: **Kupo! (The moogle happily brings out a 3-57)

**Marluxia: **Oooooooooo…You even come with your own gun!

**Moogle: **Kupo!!!!!(Starts shooting Marluxia)

**Marluxia: **Oh my dear Lord God!

Larxene sees Marluxia getting shot.

**Larxene: **Umm…

**Axel: **Marluxia getting shot by a moogle?

**Larxene: **Yea…

**Axel: **Demyx.

**Demyx: **Yo. (Gives him 1,000 munny)

* * *

No back to the show!

**Annocertress: **Evil…

**Seifer: **Thanks!

**Annocertress: **Fuu…raped Seifer…

**Seifer: **No she didn't! We did it on our own free will! Right Fuu?

**Fuu:** Yes…

**Annocertress:** Eww…

**ATW:** I agree with the Annocertress, you two are way too young!

**Seifer: **Who cares!

**ATW: **Well I never-

Rai come in through the portal.

**Rai: **Seifer, Fuu, you guys in here, y'know?

**Fuu: **(Whispers to herself) oh no!

**Rai: **There you are! Oh,Fuu, did you tell Seifer, y'know?

**Seifer: **Tell me what!?

**Rai: **That me and Fuu are dating, y'know!

**Seifer: **…WTF!?!?

**Annocertress: **…Salted…

**ATW: **Oh my.

**Seifer: **Fuu!?

**Fuu: **…Silence…

**Rai: **Whoa Seifer, I knew it would come as a shock but I didn't know you would get this mad, y'know.

**Seifer: **Mad? MAD? I'm more than mad! I'm friggin' angry!!

**Annocertress: **(Whispers to ATW) Same thing.

**ATW:** (Whispers) Well, angry is a bit harsher.

**Annocertress: **(Whispers) True-dat…

**Seifer: **You wanna know why I'm angry!?

**Annocertress and ATW: **No.

**Seifer:** I wasn't talking to you!! Anyway, I'm angry because this guy (points to Rai) is dating my girl!

**Rai: **Whoa Seifer, I'm only dating Fuu, y'know.

**Seifer: **Exactly!

**Rai: **Exactly what, y'know?

**Annocertress: **…Stupid…

**ATW: **Yes…very.

**Seifer: **Fuu is my girl!

**Rai: **That's silly, y'know. How can Fuu be dating both of us?

**Fuu: **I'm not.

**Seifer: **Ha! See Rai, Fuu is mine!

**Fuu: **No…

**Rai: **Then she's mine, y'know!

**Fuu: **No…dumbass.

**ATW: **Then why were you dating either of them?

**Fuu: **…Their munny.

With that, Fuu then left thru the portal.

**Annocertress: **Sad…so very sad.

**ATW: **Yes. I feel quite sad for those boys.

**Annocertress: **…Forget this. Wise Ansem, wanna go for pizza?

**ATW: **Sure.

* * *

Then me and Ansem the Wise left thru the portal. It then disappeared. A smoking red portal then appeared.

**Seifer: **…W-we, we got severed.

**Rai: **But we're not food, y'know.

**Seifer: **Idiot.

Would you boys need any help?

A little fairy was flying just above their heads.

**Seifer: **And who would you be?

**The Red Fairy: **Oh me! My name's The Red Fairy.

**Rai: **Your names a sentence, y'know?

**The Red Fairy: **Yes!

**Rai and Seifer: **…

**The Red Fairy: **Well, I hear you two are having some relationship problems.

**Seifer: **Yea…our girlfriend played us for our munny.

**The Red Fairy: **Well, if you follow me, I can probably help you out.

**Seifer: **Why should trust you?

**Rai: **Yea, y'know!

**The Red Fairy: **The first one through that portal gets 5,000 munny and a cookie.

**Seifer: **Get out of my way stupid! (Pushes Rai out of the way and runs thru the smoking portal)

**Rai: **Hey!That's my cookie, y'know. (Follows Seifer in suit)

**The Red Fairy: **…Idiots. (Then she flies into the red portal as well. It then disappears.)

(A/N) Oooooooooo…Where did they go? Well I would like to thank Hanakitsunechan7 for the smoking portal idea. Thank you! I want at least 2 reviews before I put chapter 2 up…so please R/R!


	2. Victum 2: Sephiroth!

Yo peoples!! I actually did another chapter today! Yay!!! Thanks for the reviews! Yes…well nothing more to say…now, let's get it on!

Disclaimer: Why am I even typing this?

_**Know Your Stars!**_

**Annocertress: **Hello again persons!

**ATW: **Yes, hello!

**Annocertress: **ATW, have you seen Rai or Seifer?

**ATW: **No…I even had your moogles do a search of this place, but they found nothing.

**Annocertress: **(sigh) Well, as long as Seifer is with Rai, they shouldn't get into too much trouble.

**ATW: **Well, let us bring in the victim.

A portal appears and two black fungi come in carrying a fainted Sephiroth.

**Annocertress: **Is he dead!?

**Black Fungi: **(They shake their heads)

**Annocertress: **Boo! Well, just leave him there.

The mushrooms drop Sephiroth on the floor and they leave back through the portal.

**ATW: **How do get all of these creatures, even the heartless, to obey you?

**Annocertress: **It's magic! But mostly because cookies have a power that no thing can resist!

**ATW: **True. Okay… the victim is here but how are we going to start if he is unconscious?

**Annocertress:** (gasp!) He's a Girl!?

**ATW: **Annocertress!

**Annocertress: **Okay, okay. Ahem…MOOGLES!

Then all of a sudden two moogles come in out of nowhere (creepy…) and they were carrying B-B guns.

**ATW: **Where do they get all these things?

**Annocertress: **It is unknown to me…Well anyway, moogles, shock him!!

The moogles then point their guns to Ansem The Wise.

**ATW: **(gasp)

**Annocertress: **Not him! The he-she!

**Moogles: **Kupooo… (ooooooooooooooh…)

The moogles then changed their line of fire to Sephiroth. Then the zapped him with 20,000 volts of electricity. That gotta hurt.

**Annocertress: **Salted.

**ATW: **Don't you think you're going a little too far?

**Annocertress: **No.

**ATW: **Okay then.

The moogles stopped and then left leaving a burnt Sephiroth behind.

**ATW: **I dare say, is that chicken I smell?

**Annocertress: **Nope. That's Sephiroth.

**ATW: **Oh.

Sephiroth then starts to wake up.

**Annocertress: **Are you alive?

**Sephiroth: **…

**Annocertress: **Boo…Anyway, know your stars, know your stars, know your stars!

**Sephiroth: **Oh hell no…

**Annocertress: **Hey!When did you stop being gay?

**Sephiroth: **...

**Annocertress: **The I.M. G.A.Y (Institution of the Mentally Gay And Young) thought you were a girl right?

**Sephiroth: **They thought I was Bi.

**Annocertress and ATW: **Why?

**Sephiroth: **They found out that I killed Aerith. They thought because I did that she was my ex.

**Annocertress and ATW: **…

**Sephiroth: **When I said I killed her so I could get Cloud they didn't believe me!

**Annocertress and ATW: **…

**Sephiroth: **Then I swore never to love another man…or woman again!

**Annocertress and ATW: **…Yes…

**Annocertress: **Well on with the show.

**ATW: **Yes, ahem…Sephiroth…he is a he-she.

**Sephiroth:** …

**ATW: **Umm…Sephiroth…he is a transvestite.

**Sephiroth: **…!

**ATW: **Grr! Sephiroth! He went into surgery so they could surgically remove his-(I cover his mouth)

**Annocertress: **Heh, heh, heh…There is a girl here y'know!

**ATW: **Oh, quite sorry. Got too into the "mood". But there is no way to make this man crack!

**Annocertress: **Okay…Let me try.

**ATW: **Of course, but where is Sephiroth?

When we were fighting, Sephiroth silently made his way toward the portal.

**Annocertress: **Oh no you don't! (I snap my fingers)

The portal then disappears.

**Sephiroth: **(begins to draw his sword) Let me leave.

**Annocertress: **Not until you let us finish!

**Sephiroth: **Fine! Do your worst.

**Annocertress: **Yay! Now, Sephiroth…he has wings growing out of his butt.

**Sephiroth: **I do not.

**Annocertress: **Have you looked at yourself lately?

**Sephiroth: **No.

**Annocertress: **…Retard…Look up.

**Sephiroth: **(looks up)

**Annocertress: **Now look down.

**Sephiroth: **(looks down and squeals like a girl) Oh my God! I do have wings!

**Annocertress: **A miracle ain't it?

**ATW: **Can I have a go?

**Annocertress: **Sure.

**ATW: **Ahem…Sephiroth…his mama's so stupid that she traded her whole life savings for a nickel and a couple of deep-fried onion rings.

**Annocertress and Sephiroth: **…………huh?

**Annocertress: **Where the heck did you get that from?

**Sephiroth: **…(frozen in shock…and anger)

**ATW: **I wanted to see if I could make a "Yo mama" joke.

**Annocertress: **Okay then…

Sephiroth was standing up with his really long(mad long!) sword 2ft. away from our faces(and he sat 9 ft from us…).

**Sephiroth: **Take that back!

**Annocertress: **Take what back?

**Sephiroth:** Take back what you said about my mama!

**ATW: **And if we say no?

**Sephiroth: **You choose. Don't apologize and die, or apologize, get hurt by my sword, go to the hospital and die there. What do you choose?

**Annocertress: **Hmm…if those are the choices then I choose…MOOGLES!

**Sephiroth: **That was not a choice.

**Annocertress and ATW: **So?

**Sephiroth:** (in a white guy trying to be a gansta voice) Grr! This is what ya get for talkin' 'bout my mama! (Takes out his sword and starts running toward us.)

Two moogles then dropped down from nowhere(amazing!) and pulled out bazookas.

**Annocertress and ATW: **Where do they get all of this stuff?

**Sephiroth: **(stops running) Heh! If you think those teddy bears are going to save you, you are terribly mistaken!

**Moogles: **(Start to get very angry)

**Annocertress: **You shouldn't've said that.

**ATW: **Quite. Moogles get offended fairly easily.

**Sephiroth: **So what!?

**Annocertress and ATW: **So this.

**Moogles: **Ku-ku…kupo…KUUUUUPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (Translation: No-one…calls us…TEDDY BEARS!!!!!!)

The moogles then set up their guns and locked their target. Sephiroth turned so pale he was…pale…

**Sephiroth: **No…no…NOOO!!!!

The moogles shot their bombs and they landed on Sephiroth in a huge explosion of smoke.

**Annocertress: **He's dead…

**ATW: **Yes.

The smoke clears. Sephiroth is lying on the floor.

**Annocertress: **Is he dead-say yes.

**ATW: **Unfortunately…no.

**Annocertress: **Boo-peanuts!! ……Okay me bored now… Who wants to go get some cookies?

**Moogles: **Kupo!(Yay!!)

**ATW: **That sounds wonderful!

**Annocertress: **To the bakery!!

I open a portal and we leave.

* * *

**Sephiroth: **(Begins to stir.)

A smoking red portal then appears. A red fairy comes out of it and flies over to an unconscious Sephiroth.

**Sephiroth: **Stupid teddy bears…

Curga is cast on him.

**Sephiroth: **…?

**The Red Fairy: **Are you alright now?

**Sephiroth: **Show your-self. Who are you?

**The Red Fairy: **Well, my name is The Red Fairy.

**Sephiroth: **…your name is a sentence?

**The Red Fairy: **Yes!

**Sephiroth: **…

**The Red Fairy: **You know, I now you want revenge. You want to defeat someone …don't you?

**Sephiroth: **…Cloud…

**The Red Fairy: **You know…if you come with me, I can give you power.

**Sephiroth: **Not interested. (Turns around) Go away fairy.

**The Red Fairy: **Fine…but I could also show you your mother.

**Sephiroth:** (Turns back around) Show me to mother.

**The Red Fairy: **Right this way.(points to the smoking red portal.

Sephiroth steps through the portal.

**The Red Fairy: **Ha-ha…baka. (She follows him through the portal and it disappears.)

* * *

One of my portals appears and I walk out.

**Annocertress: **Sephy! I can't leave you in here!…You'll scare the other moogles.

Sephiroth was nowhere to be seen.

**Annocertress: **Hmmm. Musta already teleported outta here….whatever. (I leave and the portal disappears)

(A/N) the red fairy has taken yet another victim. Oooooooooo!! What is she doing with them? Nobody knows……I want for more reviews(good ones!) and give me till Saturday to get another chapter up. Thanx for reading!! Please R/R!


	3. Victim 3: Sora!

Yo…okay peoples. It might take me a while to update because I'm gonna be devoting most of my time to my other story. This might make ya'll sad cuz you guys wanna find out what The Red Fairy is doing to the victims…all I can say is "All in good time my friends." So you guys will have to be a little patient. And now…let get it on! (This chapter is dedicated to Maple Story of Anime.)

Disclaimer: The moogles own more than I do.

_**Know Your Stars**_

**Annocertress: **We who are about to die, solute you…Hi peoples!!

**ATW: **Hello everyone. Now let us take a look at today's organizer…

**Annocertress: **We have an organizer?

**ATW: **Haven't the moogles told you?

**Annocertress: **Do you think I understand them?

**ATW: **Oh…

**Annocertress: **So…what does this 'organizer' say?

**ATW: **Oh just horoscopes, a calendar, and who we're having on the show…Stuff like that.

**Annocertress: **Gimme that!! (I snatch the organizer.)Hey…this is all in moogle!

**ATW: **Well what do you expect when the moogles are writing it?

**Annocertress: **Well who are we having!? (ATW whispers the name to me) Yaaaaaaaaaaay!! Bring in the victim that I like!!

A portal appears and Sora walks in.

**ATW: **(Whispers to me) Why isn't bound or hurt?

**Annocertress: **(Whispers back.) Because he is one of the very few characters that I like.

**Sora: **Uh…is anyone here?

**Annocertress: **Hi Sora!!

**Sora: **OMG, don't tell me this is what I think it is…

**Annocertress: **Yes! Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars!!

**Sora: **Well, if you'll excuse me…I'm just gonna leave. (Starts to walk slowly toward the portal)

**Annocertress: **Sorry, but your wish has been denied.

**Sora: **Why?

**Annocertress: **Because of this. (I snap my fingers and the portal disappears.)

**Sora: **How did you do that?!

**Annocertress: **I don't know…but that's why it's cool! Now, ATW, will you begin? ATW?

**ATW: **Zzzz… (He is sleeping.)

**Annocertress: **ATW!! How can you be sleeping at a time like this?!?!

**ATW: **Zzzzzzzz…

**Annocertress: **(Sigh) Moogles!

Two moogles drop down from nowhere carrying a stretcher. (Yet again…amazing!)

**Moogles: **Kupo! (Translation: Sir!)

**Annocertress: **Moogles, ATW needs a bed, warm milk, and a teddy bear stat!

**Moogles: **Kupo! (Translation: Sir!)

The moogles put ATW on the stretcher and disappear in a puff of smoke.

**Sora: **How do they do that?

**Annocertress: **I don't know…

**Sora:** …

**Annocertress: **Well now let's start. Sora…he got kicked out of I.M G.A.Y (Institution of the Mentally Gay And Young.) because they found out he was straight!

**Sora: **I've always been straight!

**Annocertress: **Well that's not what Google says.

**Sora: **Then what does Google say?

**Annocertress: **Like whenever I search for one of you pictures for my desktop I always see no less than ten yaoi pictures of you and Riku or you and Roxas.

**Sora: **…Eww…I feel so dirty right now…

**Annocertress: **Then go take a shower.

**Sora: **You'll let me?

**Annocertress: **No.

**Sora: **I knew it.

Then a portal appears and Kairi walks out. She is holding a remote with a big red button.

**Sora: **Oh hi Kairi.

**Kairi: **Hey Sora…What are you doing here?

**Sora: **…I don't know…What are you doing here?

**Kairi: **Well…when you disappeared I went looking for you and I found this remote. I pushed the button and a portal appeared so I walked in.

**Annocertress: **Why hello Kairi.

**Kairi: **Um hi?

**Annocertress: **That is not important…What is important is that that button is mine.

**Kairi: **It is? Here. (Gives me the button)

**Annocertress: **Now, you see the button right? (I held it in front of Kairi)

**Kairi: **Yes…

**Annocertress: **(I throw the button somewhere) Now you don't.

**Kairi: **But you just-

**Annocertress: **Now back to the subject. Ahem, Sora…he likes Riku more than Kairi…if you know what I mean.

**Kairi: **Sora! How could you do this to me!?

**Sora: **Kairi it's not true!

**Kairi: **B-but she said-

**Sora: **She says a lot of things that aren't true!

**Annocertress: **Do not…

**Sora: **Do to!

**Annocertress: **Stinkin cute liar!

**Sora: **I am not!

**Annocertress: **Okay then. Ahem, good-smelling ugly liar!

**Sora and Kairi: **…Eh?

**Annocertress: **Continuing. Sora… he picks his nose.

**Kairi: **Eww! Sora that gross!

**Sora: **What! I do not!

**Annocertress: **Then what about these pictures that are undeniable proof? (Holds up pictures)

**Sora: **Where did you get those!?

**Annocertress: **Riku.

**Sora: **Give me those!

**Annocertress: **Kairi, catch! (I throw the pictures to Kairi.)

**Kairi:** (Catches them) Awww! Sora you look so cute!

**Annocertress: **And Sora, that is really saying something…really.

**Kairi: **But…some of these are from inside your house. How did Riku get in there?

**Sora: **Don't ask me.

**Annocertress: **I know who to ask!

**Sora: **Oh God…

**Annocertress: **Moogles! You know what to do!

A portal appears and Riku walks through.

**Riku: **So this is where you've been, Sora. Why didn't you come to my house?

**Sora: **Why the hell would I want to?

**Riku: **Well you said you were gonna, heh-heh, "Play" with me.

**Annocertress, Kairi, and Sora: **…………

**Annocertress: **Okay…now that is just sick…and wrong.

**Kairi: **(Smacks Sora)

**Sora: **Kairi what was that for?

**Kairi: **(crying) I-if you didn't like me… you just had to say so! (Starts to walk away from Sora)

**Sora: **Wait! Kairi! (Starts to go after Kairi)

**Annocertress: **Tsk, tsk, tsk…A lover's quarrel. And it was all because of you. (I look at Riku)

**Riku: **…

**Annocertress: **Well, where have you been Riku? I've haven't seen you seen the first season.

**Riku: **…

**Annocertress: **Okay…I was trying to be nice but you are now on my bad side!

**Riku: **…

**Annocertress: **Argh!!! Well I might as well do you now since you aren't important enough for your own show.

**Riku: **…

**Annocertress: **Is there something wrong with you?

**Riku: **…

**Annocertress: **…Whatever. Ahem, Riku…he's been doing "things" to Kairi AND Sora when their sleeping.

Sora and Kairi stop walking and look at Riku.

**Kairi: **I-I-I feel so…violated…

**Sora: **Me too…

**Riku: **Well what can I say? You guys are the reasons why I hardly get any sleep at night.

**Annocertress, Kairi, and Sora: **…………………………………………………………………………OMGOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Annocertress: **………………………... (scared for life)

**Kairi: **Sora! Do something!

**Sora: **I'm all over this!

Riku draws out his evil keyblade thingy and Sora then takes out two key blades. Kingdom Key and-

**Annocertress: **…Heh?

**Sora: **What the…

**Kairi: **…Okay…

Yes! Sora brought out Kingdom Key and... Sweet memories!

**Annocertress: **Oh yea! Sora, the moogles are still working on your other keyblades so…yea. Sweet memories was one of the only ones there…

**Sora: **…Uh-huh…Well I can still take you on, Riku!

**Riku: **… (Starts to run toward Sora)

**Sora: **(Starts to run toward Riku)

Sora then stops in his tracks.

**Sora: **OMG! Riku look, Ansem!

**Riku: **OMFG! (Wham!!)

Riku then fell face-first onto the ground. He was passed out…but still alive and well. Boo…

**Annocertress: **Ha-ha! Riku got pawned!

**Kairi: **Great job Sora!

**Sora: **Hmph.

**Annocertress: **Now in the commeration of Riku's saltation-ness, who wants to play DDR?

**Kairi: **Me!

**Sora: **Yea!

**Annocertress: **(I open a portal) To the arcade!

**Sora: **I'll be right there.

**Annocertress and Kairi: **'Kay!

* * *

Me and Kairi leave through the portal and the portal disappears. A smoking red portal appears and The Red Fairy comes out of it.

**Sora: **(Poking Riku with Kingdom Key)

Just then Riku turned into Ansem (the heartless, mind you).

**Sora: **What the…? Ansem!? Your still alive!?

**Ansem (H): **Yes I am alive. Now, have you seen Riku?

**Sora: **…No. And why were you like Riku a minute ago?

**Ansem (H): **Well, for now I am out of the I.M G.A.Y because they do not see me with Riku. And also, (sniff) I do miss the feel of Riku's body.

**Sora: **…Okay…Eww.

**The Red Fairy: **Hey there!

**Ansem (H): **OMG a fly! Kill it!

**The Red Fairy: **I am not a fly!

**Sora: **Then what are you?

**The Red Fairy: **A fairy! The Red Fairy at your service!

**Sora: **Your name's a-

**The Red Fairy: **I know my name is a sentence! Will people just give that a rest!

**Sora and Ansem (H): **…

**The Red Fairy: **Anyway, Sora you need to be somewhere, right?

**Sora: …Yea.**

**The Red Fairy: **That portal over there will lead you anywhere you need to go. You just have to think about it.

**Sora: **Okay. Thanx. (Walks through the smoking red portal)

**Ansem (H): **This portal wouldn't, oh I don't know, help me find the man of my dreams!?

**The Red Fairy: **Um…Sure…It can do that.

**Ansem (H): **Yay! Riku! Here I come! Wait for daddy! (Runs through the portal as well)

**The Red Fairy: **Okay…some guys are just plain creepy…Oh well. (Flies through the portal)

* * *

A portal appears and Kairi and I walk out.

**Kairi:** Sora!...Sora!

**Annocertress: **Don't worry, Kairi. He's just probably helping the moogles work on his keyblades.

**Kairi: **Okay.

**Annocertress: **Good. Now back to the arcade!

* * *

We step through the portal and it disappears. ATW was now walking around with a teddy bear. He was also in his PJ's.

**ATW: **Um, hello? Is anyone there.

A light bulb then fell on his head and he was knocked-out. A moogle the walks up to him.

**Moogle: **Ku! (Translation: Oops!) ……Ooo, Kupo po kupo. (Translation: ……Well, Nighty-night.)

The moogle then puts a blanket on Ansem The Wise and walks away.

(A/N) oh no! The Red Fairy took Sora! The world is gonna end! Wah!Well anyway please review! And thanx for reading!! (sniff) Why Sora!?!?

**  
**


	4. Victum 4: Axel!

…Not really much to say…oh well…let get it on

Disclaimer: Is Square Enix Yoku-kun productions yet?...NO (notice the "yet")

_**Know your Stars!**_

**Annoncertress:** Cuz, we lost it all…nothing lasts forever...I'm sorry I can't be…Perfect…Hilo me fellow geeks.

**ATW: **Now Annoncertress that is not a very nice thing to say.

**Annoncertress: **…You do know geek is positive.

**ATW: **I stand corrected.

**Annoncertress: **Well then…bring in the victim if you please.

A portal apears and Axel walks through…competely unharmed…wow

**Annoncertres: **Whoo, another person me like.

**Axel: **Uh… wher-

**ATW: **Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars!

**Annoncertress: **...The moogles gave u something didn't they?

**ATW: **How did you know?

**Annoncertress: **…You are behaving like a child…

**ATW: **…I DRANK TO MUCH OF MY MORNING TEA ALRIGHT!!

**Annoncertress: **...It's okay ATW…no one's judging u…

**ATW: **Good…

**Annoncertress: **Now back to buisness.

**Axel: **…Again…where am I and why am I here?

**Annoncertress: **Axel, his real name is ELA!! (evil laugh)

**ATW: **…I don't quite get it Annoncertress…

**Annoncertress: **E-L-A!

**ATW and Axel: **(they shrug)

**Annoncertress: **English Language Arts!!

**ATW and Axel: **…and?

**Annoncertress: **…guess me only find that funny…whatever…Axel, he is a proud and upstanding member of the I.M. G.A.Y.

**Axel: **Sorry, but I thought about joining, but I gave it up, got it memorized?

**Annoncertress and ATW: **WE THOUGHT YOU WERE STRAIGHT!

**Axel: **Nope I-

**Annoncertress: **Objection!!

**Axel: **What?

**ATW: **We know you ate the peanut!!

**Axel: **What pean-

**Annoncertress: **Com'on gay boy we saw the jelly in your pocket!!

**Axel: **I don't have jelly in my pocket and I'm not gay!!

**ATW: **Well, my boy, are you some sort of asexual?

**Axel: **No…

**Annoncertress: **Then what the heck are you!?

**Axel: **I'm Bi.

**Annoncertress and ATW: **Wha…

**Axel: **…I'm in love with Larxene…but I got some feelings for Roxas since he is my best friend. But I'm only Bi for Roxas, got it memorized?

**Annoncertress: **…Okay…Axel I just have one more thing to say.

**Axel: **Yea?

**Anonncertress: **(I open a portal and yell) Axel, he is cheating on Larxene with Roxas!!

**Axel: **What!? I am not!

Larxene comes out of the portal and small jolts of electricity are appearing all around her.

**Larxene: **AXEL!! (Starts shooting lighting at Axel)

Axel manages to jump away. Larxene starts to fire at will all around the room. Me, ATW, and Axel manage to hide behind a table.

**Annoncrtress: **…This is what happens when a pryo and a sadist get together…

**ATW: **I think its pronounced pyro Annocertress.

**Annoncertress: **Me says pryo darn it!

**Axel: **I can't take this anymore! (comes over the tale to confront Larxene)

Axel tries to talk to Larxene but as he gets closer she launches a he thunderbolt down on his head. When he was pitch-black, she brushed off her hands and left back through the portal.

**Annoncertress: **Burn!!

**ATW: **Both figuratively and literally.

**Axel: **(Gets up and brushes off the soot) I'll show you burned!! (Summons weapons and starts shooting fire)

**ATW: **Axel is returning fire!

**Annoncertress: **Then let there be war!! Moogles! We require P.I.Z.Z.A.S.N.C.A.K.E!!

**Axel: **…Pizza 'n cake?

**Annoncertress: **Parental Interference Zig Zag Armory Systems Now Cool Awtium Killing Entities.

**Axel: **O.o

**ATW: **In other words, obscenely large bazookas that are incredibly light.

**Axel: **…Oh.

The moogle poof out of nowhere and had me and ATW a bazooka.

**Axel: **…Oh…crap.

**Annoncertress: **Fire at will!!

Me and ATW fired one round but since the bazookas were larger than any of us combined our accuracy stunk and the recoil blew us backward and stunned us for a few seconds.

**Axel: **Ha! Take this!

Suddenly a portal appears on the ceiling and Kenny (from south park) fell to the ground.

**Annoncertress: **Hey Kenny! What ye doing here?

**Kenny: **Mfffpmmnmfmphpnmm.

**Annoncertres: **Seriously? That big?

**Kenny: **Mnnmnfphhmmnph, mph mph mph nmhmn.

**Annoncertress: **That must've been some party.

**Kenny: **Phmmnmnph, mn mhn mn mn mmn.

**Annoncertress: **I see, well bye bye!

As Kenny turns to leave Axel had already sent a fireball straight at him. Kenny was blown to bits and his remains were sucked through the portal.

_**Somewhere in South Park…**_

**Cartman: **Hey guys, look at the sky.

**Kyle: **It's a bird!

**Butters: **It's a plane!

**Pip: **Well actually, I think that cloud looks more like a flower.

**Cartman: **Pip! What the hell are you doing here!?

**Stan: **No guys, it's raining Kenny!

They watch in awe as bits of Kenny's flesh, clothing, and drops of his blood poured from the sky.

**Cartman: **Hmm…very interesting…But really, what the hell are you doing here French boy!?

_**Back in the Know Your Stars Room…**_

**Annoncertress: **Oh my jaws…you killed Kenny!

**Kyle(from portal): **You bastard! (the portal closes)

**Annoncertress:** Okay…(picks up grenade) Hey Axel, think fast!

The grenade is through and Axel is knocked unconscious.

**Annoncertress: **Welp, all in a days work.

**ATW: **Annoncertress, do you always have to knock out someone before you end the show?

**Annoncertress: **Yes…yes I do…Now it is time for donuts, sugar, and (pulls out DS) the Pokémon GTS.

**ATW: **Well I could go for some coffee.

**Annoncertress: **To the Cyber Café!

**ATW: **Oh, Annoncertress, who was that little boy made out of construction paper?

**Annoncertress: **Just someone who dies a lot.

We walk through the portal and as it closes a smoking red portal appears and a red fairy comes out.

**Axel: **(Starts to stir to the smell of smoke) Mmmmmm…

**The Red Fairy: **Hey there! My name i-

**Axel:** Smoking depths of hell, here I come!! (Runs through the portal)

**The Red Fairy: **…These guys just get weirder and weirder…(flies through the portal and it closes)

This seems pretty short ot me…then again I've been watching South Park to much(long live that show darn it!) And when I was writing this, I was listening to Beethoven's symphony No. 3 in E-flat major…that thing is pretty darn good…well hopefully the next chapters will be much funnier and actually stay on topic.


	5. Victum 5: Roxas

…It's late…Meh…well, let get it on!

Disclaimer: …When all yaoi theories are dead and gone…ye all will know I own it.

_**Know your stars!**_

**Annoncertress: **Ponies on fire never bleed…Broccoli-filled children never heed to the pain they feel inside…

**ATW: **Um…Annoncertress?

**Annoncertress: **I don't know either…Well then, bring in the victim!

A portal appeared and Roxas walked out with two berserkers clutching his arms. He was also cuffed and a moogle was holding a gun to his head.

**Annoncertress: **Good work men, you may leave him…but put the collar on him…

The berserkers leave and the moogle places a spiked collar around Roxas' neck before departing as well.

**ATW: **Ah, Roxas! Long time no see! How have you been?

**Roxas: **…!

**ATW: **Roxas? Em, Annoncertress, what's wrong with the chap?

**Annoncertress: **…

**ATW: **Annoncertress?

**Annoncertress: **I hate you Roxas…

**ATW: **Oh dear-

**Annoncertress: **NUWEGAH!

**Roxas and ATW: **O.o

A moogle walks up and hands me a scroll-like…thingy

**Annoncertress: **Ahem, (I begin to read) Roxas-nobody-guy-person-thingy…

**Roxas and ATW: **…?

**Annoncertress: **You are hereby sentenced to an extremely painful execution that will include snails, mushrooms, and enormous amounts of pink bubble-gum lip gloss.

ATW removes the collar around Roxas' neck.

**Roxas: **WHAT!

**ATW: **On what charges!

**Annoncertress: **ATW…you dare defy me and stand up for the condemned!?

**ATW: **Well-

**Annoncertress: **Not another word! Moogles! Take us to the courtroom!

The moogles teleport us to the courtroom where Roxas is put into a striped black and white jail suit and I am in the judges chair with green wig and black robe.

**Vincent Valentine (a.k.a bailiff): **All rise… her honor, Judge Michelle, presiding.

**Annoncertress: **Sit…in the case of Roxas vs. me…Roxas…how do you plead?

**Roxas: **I have-

**Annoncertress: **Guilty!!!

**Roxas: **What!

**Annoncertress: **To the lip gloss with ye!

**ATW: **Annoncertress, please! Give this boy a fair trial.

**Annoncertress: **…Alright…I'll give ye persons 5 minutes to deliberate…but I'm only doing for ATW…I'll be in the snack bar…

As I leave Roxas and ATW gather together to speak about this trial.

**Roxas: **Ansem, wtf is happening!

**ATW: **Well, you seem to be on trial-

**Roxas: **No, I mean, why am I here, who the heck is she, and-and why does she hate me so much!?

**ATW: **I'm not quite sure…But I'm paid no matter which way this trial goes.

**Roxas:** Ansem!!

**ATW: **Alright, alright. Just stay down and let me handle this eh?

**Roxas: **Thanks.

_5 minutes later…I arrive back in the courtroom ._

**Bailiff: **All rise! (Helps me to my chair)

**Annoncertress: **…Any girl would love to be in me position right now…continuing! Be seated. ATW, show your case…

**ATW: **Your honor, my client is weak, feeble minded and a complete disgrace to the human race and society-

**Roxas: **Hey!

**ATW: **But please, his stupidity is not his fault, he was just born that way.

**Roxas: **Ansem!

**ATW: **We beg your mercy.

**Annoncertress: **…mm…Alright…I hereby reduce the defendant's sentence to public humiliation! Bring out the maid suit.

Vincent brings in a skimpy maid suit with no back, a bonnet, fishnet leggings, black high heels, and an apron that says, "My house is SO dirty~".

**Roxas: **No flippin' way! What the hell is wrong with you! There is no way that I'm gonna do that!

Silence…

**ATW: **…So close

**Annoncertress: **Ahem…I hereby declare Roxas to both the punishments of public humiliation…and the lip-gloss.

**Roxas: **Whatever!

**Annoncertress: **It is so ordered! (I bang the gavel)

**ATW: **Dear boy you better start groveling.

**Roxas: **I'd like to see you try!

**Annoncertress: **Moogles…Bailiff…

Moogles drop down from nowhere with the suit. One of them was holding a gun. Vincent then comes out with a huge vat of live snails, spotted mushrooms, and gallons of bubblegum lip-gloss. Vincent held Roxas down and the moogles put the suit on him. Another moogle prepared the vat and a camera.

**ATW: **Thank goodness I can only see his rump…I don't even wanna imagine a fruit bowl (shivers).

**Annoncertress: **Disgusting…Take the picture!!

They finished chaining and gagging Roxas and the take some pictures.

**ATW: **What kind of sick person would enjoy his!?

**Annoncertress: **IDK, ask yourself. I got the suit and gags from your house.

**ATW:** Well I am grown man and you have no right to search through…my personal things…

**Annoncertress: **Whatever you say…sick person-ahem. Send the pictures to his facebook and begin his other punishment…ATW…you and I are going to the zoo.

**ATW: **After you miss.

I change and a portal appears. We walk through and Roxas is undergoing his sentence. When the sentence is done the moogles and Vincent leave a very shiny pink and snail covered Roxas on the floor…still gagged and in costume. A smoky red portal appears.

**The Red Fairy: **Mmm, bubble-gum. …Uh… (Looks at Roxas and removes the gag)

**Roxas: **(deep inhale) Why me…

**The Red Fairy: **Oh aren't you a cute uke!

**Roxas: **I AM NOT GAY!!

**The Red Fairy: T**he dress?

**Roxas: **…

**The Red Fairy: **Okay then (takes off chains) come with me, I'll get you cleaned up.

**Roxas: **Thank-you, finally someone sane. (Walks through the portal…the suit is still on)

**The Red Fairy: **Ewww…Fruit bowl…(slowly flies through the portal)

**A/N **Oh how I hate Roxas…I hate him with a passion…I hate his English voice person two…darn you Roxas…Ya so this was just on big character bashing chapter. Roxas lovers…no offense to ye but me just really hate that dude…ugh…


End file.
